The Middleburg Eccentric, 2004 to 2022, preserved in full. Our Middleburg Town Council Report continues.

Super Powers

· By Brandy Greenwell · From pages 36, 37 of the print edition

If you could have a super power what would it be? Just like when people buy lottery tickets and dream about what they would do with the winnings, I think people spend some brainpower on the "what if's" of having a superpower. What would you do with your power? How would it change you, your life and those around you? Having any kind of superpower could be heavy and deep…or a lot of fun.

If you choose telepathy, would you use it in high-powered business negotiations, a record-breaking run on Jeopardy or to find out what your friends really think about you? Imagine being able to know when your BFF thinks you're ugly or if the person that you don't know that well is secretly in love with you to the point where no other can compare.

Would time travel be your choice? Would you go back and warn JFK, go back in time to make bets on sure thing winners like in Back to the Future II, or go back to the moment right before you got dumped and have the last word?

Would you want the power of invisibility? You could be privy to top-secret meetings without being known. Imagine what you could witness in Washington, DC alone! Alternatively, if you were an invisible teenager, you could sneak out of your parent's house or turn the power on right before you got caught doing something naughty.

The power of healing could be a very well chosen superpower. Imagine if you could cure cancer, or HIV or even just stop the tears of a child who broke their leg. That would be amazing. However, if every woman in Northern Virginia knew you could heal, they would be stalking, kidnapping, tripping, and hair pulling to get you to wave your powers to permanently "heal" where they botox, lipo and lift.

How about superhuman strength? You would be able to rip open cars like the Jaws of Life to save people or just imagine how speedy and effortless throwing hay would be.

Immortality would be a controversial superpower. On the one hand, living forever would be powerful yet on the other hand lonely. I guess you could smoke as many cigarettes as you'd like without the fear of dying from cancer or take dare-devilish risks because you know you wouldn't perish by accident. If I were immortal, I'd still probably refrain from wrestling a Grizzly Bear or jumping off the Empire State building.

Having a superpower seems like a lot of responsibility. Around Middleburg when the cat got out of the bag that you could throw hay bales without a grunt or wave a magical botox finger, you'd be screwed. I'll stick to just being me with regular ol' me powers.